What's in a civil ceremony?

Oburren@hotmail.com (Olivia Burren) — Mon, 12 Dec 2022 16:11:28 GMT

What's in a civil ceremony?

I want to help you to create a ceremony that reflects the life and personality of the person whose life is being celebrated. It's usual to include one or two of their favourite pieces of music, or perhaps a song with words which have a particular meaning for the family and friends. A poem can often express a range of emotions in a few words, so many ceremonies include one or two poems. Even if you choose not to have a religious ceremony you may wish to have a hymn, a prayer or a reading from a religious text such as the Bible - a civil celebration can include any or all of these.

The main part of the ceremony will be the tribute to the person, sometimes called a eulogy. This is something I will write after speaking to the family and anyone else connected with your loved one. It will be sent to you in advance of the funeral for approval and so that you can add anything else that you feel is important. Sometimes family members want to write or deliver all or part of the eulogy and in that case I will work with them to help them speak confidently on what can be a very stressful occasion.

Inevitably, the time available for the service is not long enough to include everything that you might want. Most families will continue after the service to share refreshments and memories with those who have attended. If there are some other favourite items of music, this can be an appropriate time to enjoy them.

Oct 5, 2022

Making your ceremony personal

Oburren@hotmail.com (Olivia Burren) — Mon, 12 Dec 2022 16:08:01 GMT

Making your ceremony personal

As a civil celebrant I ensure that every ceremony I create is different. It will reflect the person whose life is being honoured, and your own words will be used to describe them. Each of us is an individual and it is important that in saying goodbye to someone, we reflect their individuality.

Music choices are very important - will you choose something that they loved, or something which reflects your feelings? Either way, which artist do you want, and which version?

Poems can often summarise your feelings in a few words. There is a huge choice of poetry and readings. Sometimes you may have received a card with a poem which just sums up what you would like to say. Don't worry if it is something you've seen used elsewhere, poems become popular just because they are so effective at expressing the right feelings.

Have you thought about a visual tribute? You may have photographs on a printed Order of Service, but what about a photograph of the person displayed throughout the ceremony, either in a frame or on a screen. Slideshows are often used to display a number of different photographs, and these can be set to music - check with your funeral director whether this is possible at the venue you have chosen.

Is there something that could be displayed during the service that will bring the person to mind? A tool of their trade; a bottle of their favourite drink, or an item of clothing - football scarves are often used, but you are not limited to those. A beekeeper's veil, a golf club or cricket bat, a baseball cap from a favourite holiday destination or even a pair of walking boots - these are all items that will acknowledge the work, interests and passions of the person whose life is being celebrated.

You may feel that none of these is right for you, and that's fine too - because everyone is different. If your loved one was someone who lived simply and did not like a fuss, then it is proper that the service should reflect that. Make it personal to them, and you can take comfort in knowing that you have said goodbye in a way that was right for them.

Oct 16, 2022

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What's in a civil ceremony?

What's in a civil ceremony?

Making your ceremony personal

Making your ceremony personal